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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 5, 2008 12:43:57 GMT -5
A post-mortem criminal investigation following the shootings of some sea lions.Now, I'm not saying that the sea lions should have been shot or that I'm glad that they were shot, but doesn't it seem a wee bit odd that all of those man-hours are being spent to conduct criminal investigations and autopsies into the shooting deaths of some wildlife? Granted, yes, they're marine mammals and therefore in the Top .0001% of all life in terms of intelligence. But still. It's six sea lions. With my own eye-balls have I seen a living sea lion swim full steam through the putrid diarrhea cloud of his kin. I'm serious. It happened at Sea World. My point is, they're wild animals. They die all the time. They get killed by people all the time. Is all of this really necessary? People die by the truckloads and this level of inquiry into their deaths doesn't happen. To sum up: they're god damned wild animals. Shit happens.
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Post by Dancin' Dan the Doo-Dah Man on May 6, 2008 3:32:01 GMT -5
Is the investigation being performed because of their endangered status?
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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 6, 2008 7:44:23 GMT -5
Keep in mind Danny that these are the self-same sea lions that were going to be shot by the local authorities until an activist group got a court injunction temporarily barring it. So as it stands, shooting the sea lions is local government policy.
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Post by pinkard on May 6, 2008 7:57:26 GMT -5
The investigation is being performed because some very Specialized Americans need something to do.
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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 6, 2008 8:21:59 GMT -5
I think I'm at the point where I believe South Park is a new Gospel or something.
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Post by Dancin' Dan the Doo-Dah Man on May 6, 2008 9:15:07 GMT -5
Goddammit, why is CNN always such a slow-loading site? Anyway, the only reason I can see why there might be an investigation is if sea lions are a federally protected endangered species, but if the local gummint was about to have them shot anyway (sea lions are f?cking aggressive) then I pretty much doubt that they're endangered. Wikipedia doesn't say anything about them being endangered. Get this, though: Why in the world is everybody so f?cking determined to believe that marine mammals are harmless cute creatures, even the ones that eat other mammals that are something like human-sized? The California Sea Lion is protected (Least Concern status) and males are eight feet long and 860 pounds. Yet when one of these massive predators attacks a human it's "probably unintentional" and the animal was probably "attempting to play" because, as we've been told time and again, "humans taste bad" to whatever sea animal attacked the human in the first place, whether it's a sea lion, a killer whale or even a f?cking shark, as if animals that are known to eat man-made metallic junk really give a shit about the flavor of their meals. Very strange.
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Post by pinkard on May 6, 2008 9:17:31 GMT -5
Cleveland. Shitfish.
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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 6, 2008 9:24:10 GMT -5
GIVE MY REGARDS!
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Post by Dancin' Dan the Doo-Dah Man on May 6, 2008 15:29:27 GMT -5
I doubt anybody will be wrestling a sea lion out of the water, and even if they did they'd likely be f?cked without a weapon.
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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 6, 2008 15:30:54 GMT -5
"f?cked" as in "raped"?
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Post by Dancin' Dan the Doo-Dah Man on May 6, 2008 15:36:31 GMT -5
No, f?cked as in "doomed".
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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 6, 2008 15:39:20 GMT -5
"Doomed" as in "raped"?
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Post by Dancin' Dan the Doo-Dah Man on May 6, 2008 15:41:30 GMT -5
<sigh>
No. Doomed as in doomed. AS IN GETTING YOUR FACE EATEN BY AN 860 POUND CARNIVORE WITH AN ATTITUDE.
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Post by Lord Bismarcus on May 6, 2008 15:44:58 GMT -5
Maybe there's a 40lbs sub-sub-species out there!
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Post by Dancin' Dan the Doo-Dah Man on May 6, 2008 15:55:57 GMT -5
WHATEVER. DON'T f?ck WITH SEA LI0NS.
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